Cupcakes and papers and pizza oh my!

The title doesn't really have anything to do with anything I am going to type, its just some ramdom things that popped into my head at that moment.

I just finished writing a paper for my AP Psych class, it was on conditioning, very easy. I like that class its just really easy to fake your projects and papers and put them off which isnt good for a procrastinator like me.

Today has been a very interesting day, lots of time to think and just relax. I've been thinking a lot lately and I've come to realise I have no idea what I want to do in life. There are things I'd rather do more than others but there are some things which have even standing. I've been telling people that I want to study Psychology in college and become a psychologist but there is also a part of my brain that wants to start my own business. I'd love to have a small town restaurant sort of thing. I love cooking and I love cooking for people and making them happy. But I don't know how serious this idea in my brain is and even if it is I have no idea how to run my own business anyways.

But of course there is the really really fanatical, silly imaginary part of my brain that just wants me to skip college, run off and get married, and have kids. I love kids but I know I am not ready to have any but there is this ache in me when I see people with their children and I want it for myselsf sooo much, no matter how unrealistic.
I guess thats what I really wanted to write about today, what I want and what i think I want.

Have a good day all.

A little something for when you're down

Because everyone loves it when elephants vomit mice.

Is it just a relative term?

I'm afraid of what it means to you.
When you say forever.

Is your definition the same as mine?

When I speak of forever, I want to see you every time I wake up in the morning. I want to be there for you whenever your need me. I want to spend all of my life with you. I want you to be the one that I say "I do" to. I want to share all of my memories with you. And most of all, I want to make our own life story with you.

I may be young, I may be foolish. I may not think clearly all of the time. But I know that you are what I want and who I want to be with. Nothing will change about that.

I'm not here to change my mind, I know that you fear that. I'm a person who isn't going to back out on this type of bargain.

I'm not here to lie to you, I wouldn't be able to if I tried. Unless it was another surprise birthday party...




I'm not here to back out later.

I'm jumping in feet first and coming up swimming. I don't know where I am going but as long as you are there, it doesn't matter.

I wanna wake up where you are

You make me smile when nothing else can.
You make the monsters in my head go away
You numbed the pain when nothing else would.
You are the reason I wake up every morning.
You keep me entertained when I am bored.
You make me amazing food when I'm hungry.
You make an adventure out of everything.
You help me conquer my fears.


You make me remember why I love life

Here is where i want to be

She never wants to leave that place.
Where she feels so safe.
Where nothing can go wrong.
Where she feels like someone cares.
Someone understands her.
Where she is always welcome.
It's the only place she feels sane.
They are her safe haven.

She hopes those arms will never push her away.

Rain is the best thing ever

Ha ha who would have ever thought that it could be so fun.
Its been a long time since I've enjoyed anything that much.

So thanks for that. You know who you are. haha.